August 16, 2007

Overheard in my e-mail

Filed under: HA! — Twin C @ 8:36 am

I can’t read Overheard in New York at work anymore - it’s blocked. But they are now sending e-mail once a week with the highest rated quotes, and I thought these two were especially funny:

Julio, Your Mother and I Have Asked You Repeatedly to Make All Local Stops

Little brother, running up street: Look at me — I’m the 4 train!
Older brother, running next to him: Look at me — I’m the 6 train!
Little brother: Stop running faster than me!
Older brother: Nuh-uh.
Little brother: Dad! Julio didn’t stop at 33rd Street!

–31st St, Astoria

Overheard by: five year old kids can figure this out — why can’t tourists?

See, Your Mistake Was Promising to Pay It Back

Hobo: Can you spare a quarter?
20-ish guy: I’m broke. I owe the government 70 thousand dollars.
Hobo, after a pause: Would you like a quarter?

–Madison Square Garden

Overheard by: Jesus Jon

August 13, 2007

It’s ON!

Filed under: PolenBabble — Twin C @ 8:04 am

I will be doing this. You should too!

Agents,

You are invited to participate in our next mission, The Mp3 Experiment
Four. It is happening Saturday the 18th (this Saturday!) at 4 PM and
promises to be a boatload of fun. All information is posted on our
site:

http://www.improveverywhere.com/2007/08/12/participate-saturday-in-the-mp3-experiment-four/

Praise Steve!

UPDATE: Okay, so I’m not actually going to be doing this. I’ve got a floater in my eye - “a speck or string that appears to be drifting across the eye just outside the line of vision, caused by cells or cell fragments in the vitreous humor registering on the retina” - except that it is not just outside but actually right in my line of vision, and it’s freaking me out, so I’m heading up to the Polenberg ancestral home, where Dr. Polenberg, an optometrist, is going to check it for me. So, I suck again, and YOU should go, and tell me how great it is.

August 11, 2007

Nerd Pride!

Filed under: PolenBabble — Twin C @ 10:30 am

At long last, I will finally be able to do something I’ve ALWAYS wanted to.

Weird Al is coming to the Beacon Theater on September 20th. Tickets go on sale Monday at 10 a.m. I am absolutely buying one. It’s a little close to the wedding, so I’ll make sure PSB is down - hell, she may want to go!

In a few hours we’re off to Long Island for Twin D’s wedding! They’ll be a big post about it on Monday. After I buy my ticket.

August 8, 2007

Cool website to mess around with.

Filed under: PolenBabble — Twin C @ 9:31 am

Via Twin D! Who’s too lazy to post it himself:

A GoogleMaps mash up on a runners’ website that tells you how far it is from one place to another.

August 7, 2007

Google Chat is gone.

Filed under: Kvetch! Kvetch! Kvetch! — Twin C @ 3:47 pm

They caught on, finally, and blocked it.

Oh well. It was good while it lasted.

UPDATE: working again??????

2ND UPDATE: Nope. Gone. It may be a server issue though. . .

Is this equation true?

Filed under: PolenBabble — Twin C @ 9:16 am

Google translator + Spanish speaking coworker to proofread = kiss ass letter to manager of Mexian hotel

The property where we’re staying in Cancun was being rather unresponsive to initial e-mails I had sent them about the fact that we’re coming a day late, and that if possible we’d really like an ocean view room, and we might want to upgrade to an all inclusive stay if it’s not too expensive. After a month of being ignored, even after trying to escalate to the general manager of the hotel, I finally got someone to respond to me in the corporate office, and the hotel started writing back. I’m currently in touch with the manager in charge of timeshares (we got the room as a present from PSB’s stepdad, who’s in a bunch of different timeshare programs). Hopefully she’ll think “Ah, this American made an attempt to speak to me in my own language, not his own, that was very kind of him, I will give him everything he asks!”, and not “Stupid American with his lousy internet translator, sending me a message a five year old could have come up with. Bastard! He gets a room with an air conditioner view!” (Which was basically the view PSB and I got when we were at Atlantis two years ago.)

August 6, 2007

A new site to go to -

Filed under: PolenBabble — Twin C @ 1:03 pm

The Perry Bible Fellowship.

Amazing, hysterical, haunting comics. Now in the Bestest Sites Ever as well.

Stuff from last week. . .

Filed under: PolenBabble — Twin C @ 8:47 am

Last week I had the pleasure of seeing two friends of mine from LA, who I haven’t seen in about five years (!!!). We went out to eat a zillion times, I dragged them to TMBG (one really liked it, one “put up with it” but enjoyed parts), and they even helped PSB and I put together our wedding invitations, which have finally gone out. It was great to see them.

PSB rocked the Liar show on Saturday night, telling the “girl off the roof story” that can be read here. I didn’t vote for who the liar was, as I felt I had an unfair advantage knowing one person’s story was true already, but I guessed correctly - it was Ned, who’s story was pretty convincing until he claimed that the Jewish American Princess he was dating was listening to the oldies station on the radio - there’s no way in hell a teenage JAP is listening to WCBS - she’s got top 40 on, without a doubt.

I actually got a head start on writing my toast for next weekend. Twin D, you’ve got six more days!!! You should be blogging your angst. Or excitement. Or something.

August 3, 2007

PSB performs! Twice in two weekends!

Filed under: PolenNews — Twin C @ 9:02 am

If you want to check out my soon to be wife telling some stories, here’s the scoop!

Show #1 — This Saturday, August 4: The Liar Show

I was thrilled to be asked to participate in this evening, which is curated and hosted by Moth favorite Andy Christie. The show is a twist on storytelling — four people tell stories, but one of them is making theirs up. The audience will quiz us at the end and vote on who the liar is. I think if you read the Polenblog, you probably know the story I’m telling (so don’t skew the voting). :) But it should be fun. It starts early, so you can come and then have the rest of your evening.

6pm
THIS SATURDAY, August 4
CORNELIA STREET CAFE
29 Cornelia Street (bet W 4th & Bleecker)
$12 - includes one drink.
http://www.theliarshow.blogspot.com/

Show #2 — Friday, August 10 Burning Briefs: Tales of the Burning Man at the Jivamukti Yoga School

My friend Jonny curates and hosts this show, which will feature stories that all take place at or are influenced by The Burning Man Festival. I will be telling a pretty complex, emotionally-risky story at this one. I’m terrified, but very excited.

Friday, August 10
8:30pm - doors; 9:00p - performance
Jivamukti Yoga School
841 Broadway, 2nd floor (btw 13th & 14th Ave)
212-353-0214 ext. 0
$10 advance, $15 Door
Tickets: https://clients.mindbodyonline.com/home.asp
http://realitysandwich.com

Five storytellers will lay bare what happens when they venture into the desert to live and revel in America’s most celebrated Mecca for “radical free expression,” the Burning Man Festival. Come hear mythic tales of late-night vision-quests, impossible synchronicities, playa melt-downs, art car chases, shade structure blow-outs, life-altering epiphanies, and all the magic and mischief that happens when 30,000-plus people converge in one place to manifest their dreams.

Featuring:
Daniel Pinchbeck: Editorial Director of Reality Sandwich, Author of “2012: The Return of Quetzalcoatl” & “Breaking Open the Head: Psychedelics and Contemporary Shamanism”
Catherine Burns: Artistic Director of the Moth, Storyteller at Moth performances at The Aspen Comedy Festival, Central Park SummerStage, and The Players Club, Spearheaded 2004-2006 NYC Burning Man Fire Conclave.
Sandhi Ferreira: Jivamukti Yoga Teacher, Fire Hoop Performer, Hoop Yoga Instructor and Creator, Aerial Dancer
Bill Kennedy: Grand Space Events Coordinator, Reality Sandwich Networking Liaison, Intrepid Cultural Maven, Writer, Actor, Bartender
Martin Dockery: Storyteller for Hearsay, Four-time Finalist in The Moth’s Grandslam Storytelling Championship, Author/Performer of one-man show Wanderlust
Hosted by Jonathan Phillips: Managing Editor of Reality Sandwich, Executive Editor of Souldish.com, Founder of The NYC Gnostics

Hope to see you there!

August 2, 2007

MY CUBE!!!!

Filed under: PolenBabble, Kvetch! Kvetch! Kvetch! — Twin C @ 10:11 am

I went over today to see if anyone had moved into any of the three cubes around the one I’m moving into in a few weeks, and some woman was sitting in it! I said “Hi, I’m sorry, I’ll be moving here in two weeks.” She said “I think these four cubes were blocked for me and my colleagues.” I said “Yo, bitch, get yo skanky ass outta my cube!”

No, not really. I should have. I’m going to get the shank now, and I’m very unhappy about it. I see which new cube I should move into, at least, but now I’m going to have no fucking privacy. How am I supposed to slack when everything I might look at on the internet can be scrutinized by the other people in my row, plus by anyone who happens to be walking by? GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH. Not. Happy.

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