October 31, 2005

Fine, You Bastards.

Filed under: PolenBabble — Twin A @ 3:35 pm

So none of you wanted to come with me to the parade.

Fine.

I feel crappy today anyway. I stayed home from work with a headache and general malaise. Kissyfur got some kind of horrible stomach ailment last night and I feared the Reaper. Or at least, I feared having to run out of work to do something horribly nasty in the corporate privy.

So, no technologically mediated GWB in the parade. Clearly, without this it is going to suck. Stay home and work on your tin foil hats, kids. You never know what they’re up to. Expecially that Twin C. One more monday without tiny little babies to look at, and he’s going to manufacture a Kvetch Death Ray that’s going to strike us down one and all. Beware the power of the Kvetch.

And, the Kvetch mug. Kvetch! Kvetch! Kvetch! Kvetch! Kvetch! Kvetch! Kvetch! Kvetch! Kvetch! Kvetch!

Dear Monday,

Filed under: Kvetch! Kvetch! Kvetch! — Twin C @ 2:14 pm

Why the fuck do you suck so hard?

Why is everyone sitting around me so LOUD?

Why am I so cranky all I want to do is poke my eyes out and hurl them at everyone?

Love,
Twin C

October 28, 2005

Who Wants To March In The Halloween Parade With Me?

Filed under: PolenBabble — Twin A @ 11:09 am

Hey Polenblog Lovers,

This is the exciting opportunity for one of you lucky MFs to march in the East Village Halloween Parade with me as I wear my video mask with George Bush’s face on it and launch The Cutup And Funny Quotes Of Our Profoundly Befuddled And Evil Leader into space, and into the audience.

I will need you to do the following:

1. Dress up like the Secret Service.
2. This includes sunglasses.
3. Push around a little rolly cart with an amplifier, battery, and inverter on it, but carefully, so as not to disturb the cables.
4. Monitor whether my mask is working or not.
4. Keep anything bad from happening to me (which nothing ever does while wearing the video mask — everyone loves it)

Also, I’ll make sure the video goggles are actually working, so I’ll be able to see. That will be ducky.

Parade starts around 7 in the EV — whoever writes me at that address over to the right (in the Twin Communication section) first is the lucky winner! Be adored by tens of thousands of fans! Help mock our leadership! Huzzah!

October 27, 2005

Geek Time is ON

Filed under: PolenBabble, Kvetch! Kvetch! Kvetch! — Twin C @ 12:37 pm

Successful run to a Gamestop has Capcom Classics, Call of Cthulhu, and Indigo Prophecy all waiting patiently in my apartment for the XBox to return, courtesy of Twin A. He and our pal Big Mike are stopping by this evening for some gamin’ and boozin’.

Last night PSB and some Moth ladies and I went to see Moth regular Brian Finklestein in his one man show at the UCB Theater. It was AMAZING. Keep your eye out for Brian’s work in the future. It will be worth seeing.

The horrible woman in cube farm near me is somehow making even more noise than before. She’s started talking to herself/singing to herself too. I’m eyeing all the sharp objects on me desk, but have not acted as of yet. The other people around me all agree that she is really fucking loud. If she hadn’t started gossiping about me when she immediately got here, I seriously might not mind as much, but since she’s already irritated me everything she does now gets under my skin. Bah.

October 26, 2005

see what time this is posted……

Filed under: Kvetch! Kvetch! Kvetch! — Twin B @ 11:08 pm

I’ll be awake at 3:30 AM for a Bon Jovi music video shoot.
ON A STEEL MOTHERFUCKIN HORSE.
atleast he’s (John) is going to give me a handjob just
like Larry Harvey did on the playa.
everyword I write is less sleep I am getting tonight,
I hope you all now know how I personally suffer for the blog.
Unlike twin c, who just suffers.
sleep. fucker, sleep.

anyone seen my wallet?

October 25, 2005

Corporate Shwag!

Filed under: PolenBabble — Twin C @ 1:12 pm

Often, after a meeting or event, the admins at our company will get the spoils. More often, we get the shaft. But sometimes we get stuff that’s pretty cool, and in my old position, I was actually given some pricey stuff, including a 512MB Ipod Shuffle (that I gave to PSB as a present, since my Palm Pilot already has an mp3 player installed, and I have a 512MB card I bought for it a few months ago). Today I was brought the welcome basket from my department’s trip to Miami last week, and here’s what it included:

Chocogators!!!

Mmmmm. Cookies.

There was also a bag of trail mix.

Not a bad present, especially for me, with my massive sweet tooth and 3 p.m. hunger attacks, where I feel like I could eat my entire desk if it had a candy coating.

I especially like the Chocogators.

October 24, 2005

Nice Job KD!

Filed under: PolenBabble, Kvetch! Kvetch! Kvetch! — Twin C @ 11:33 am

My friend Kid Dynamite placed WAY high up in the tournament - 16th! He won himself an Xbox 360. Kid, you rock. And I hate you.

So a recap of the less sucky part of the weekend:

The cat theater was mostly entertaining and partially horrifying. The main performer was an older man who seemed to be milking the audience way too much - it was hard to figure out if the show was really just meant for kids. The cats were about as well trained as you could expect cats to be. They were all adorable. They also seemed to be well treated, but sometimes the tricks they performed seemed more cruel than anything else - at one point he was swinging a Siamese around on a rope, and the cat just sat there and didn’t move - it didn’t look like it was having much fun though, and PSB and I felt bad for it. I don’t know if it was worth $50 a ticket, but I’m still glad I went.

Saturday night my friend Ivy and I went to Mo Pitkins for some Judeo-Latino fusion - I had matza ball soup and some brisket! - and then we saw the Murray Hill show. Other than the fact that it started an hour late, it was totally awesome. I ran into other friends there, Stacy and Bryce, who had friends in from out of town, Jen and Jim, and we made up the core heterosexual contingency - it was a very mixed audience, and Murray made sure we all got made fun of. Dirty Martini and the World Famous BOB performed some burlesque, as well as a tranny named Henry, who was hysterical, twirling her shirt that got caught in her hair as if it were a pastie. There was also an “air opera” contest, which Jen ended up winning!

Back at the desk and bitter as hell. I’ve been blocked from my favorite sexplorer’s website here, giving me one less reason to stay here. Everyone around me is speaking through megaphones. I just want to go home.

October 23, 2005

Freaking Tournaments.

Filed under: Kvetch! Kvetch! Kvetch! — Twin C @ 5:12 pm

Well, once again, my tournament skills are shown to blow. I’m out with the first third of people or so (2nd UPDATE: No, I did slightly better than that. I outlasted a little more than half the field. The grapes don’t taste any sweeter.). I got counterfeited on the board, to my credit - my 66 lost to KJ when the board showed 7A73A - two pair, higher kicker for the jackass with the big stack, and me cursing up a storm.

Now I can only hope that Kid Dynamite can do better.

UPDATE: I’ve now also had such a bad session it’s taken considerable restraint not to put my fist through my monitor. I’m going to stop playing and watch some movies with PSB, and try to forget about the entire afternoon.

I’ll tell you about the Cat Theater and Saturday night’s events tomorrow.

October 21, 2005

Vindicated

Filed under: HA! — Twin C @ 1:43 pm

From Mike Daisey: Random Facts about Vin Diesel.

The top 30 are hysterical if you just want to skip to the good stuff.

Meeeeeeeeeeoooooooooooow.

Filed under: PolenBabble — Twin C @ 12:16 pm

PSB and I are off to the Moscow Cat Theater tonight. Trained kitties! Hooray! It should be fun.

Then PSB is off to New Haven tomorrow night, so I am going to skank around with my friend Ivy.

Sunday is the Blogger Tourney! I’m excited for that, even though I am most likely going to crash and burn. I’ll take it as a moral victory if I can outlast Kid Dynamite.

What are you up to?

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